


I don't want to lose (part of me)

by iamirondad



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, Spider-Man: Homecoming (2017), The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Avengers: Endgame (Movie), Avengers: Endgame (Movie) Spoilers, Ned Leeds Needs a Hug, Protective Ned Leeds, Protective Peter Parker
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-26
Updated: 2019-05-26
Packaged: 2020-03-17 14:12:27
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,236
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18966847
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/iamirondad/pseuds/iamirondad
Summary: Peter and Ned survived the decimation, alongside the Avengers they travel back in time to collect the infinity stones and bring their loved ones back. A twist of fate sees them end up on Vormir.





	I don't want to lose (part of me)

**Author's Note:**

> An Anon on Tumblr made me do this, please blame them for this pain!

Peter had been to space before. It was not an experience he would forget, no matter how much he wanted too. It had been five years, but his nightmares kept it at the forefront of his mind. He had fought against the infamous Thanos on Titan and lost, and then he watched those around him crumbled away into nothing.

He was relieved Tony survived, and he could still remember the hug they shared after the decimation; he didn’t think Tony would ever let go him. When they finally got home, Peter realised he was one of the _lucky ones_ . May lived, and so did Ned. Although, Ned lost everything; all he had left was Peter. The world was not fortunate, and everyone struggled to move on. Half of the population disappeared in an instant, including some of the earth’s greatest defenders: _Steve Rogers, Natasha Romanoff,_ and _James Rhodes._

Peter had never expected a chance to try again, but when Scott Lang returned with a proposition, he knew they had to take it. Peter never thought he’d step on an alien planet again, and he definitely didn’t expect to be doing so with Ned Leeds, _his best friend._

Vormir was gorgeous, a dark purple surrounded the duo as they touched down on the surface. Ned chuckled nervously before bouncing away from his chair to look out of the window, “Dude, this is awesome.”

“Yeah, it really is,” Peter chuckled; he deactivated his quantum suit to reveal his retro Stark suit underneath.

“Old school.” Ned gasped as he turned around to face him, “Where’s the Iron Spider?”

“Tony was updating it before all his happened.” Peter shrugged, “So, this one will have to do for now.”

“Nice.” Ned remarked, “Where do we go then?”

Peter walked over to the window, “I’m guessing there.” He pointed up to a daunting mountain in front of them.

Ned tapped Peter’s back, “Let’s get going!”

They stepped off the ship onto the planes of Vormir; it didn’t take long to reach the bottom of the mountain. They both decided to past the time talking about utter nonsense, such as what they were going to have as a celebrational dinner when they got back. Pizza is what they settled on.

“Do we just...climb up?” Ned asked.

“I guess.” Peter stepped back to look up; he held up his arm and sent a line of web up to a ledge, “Or swing up?”

“Cool."

Peter shook his head as he chuckled, “Two seconds.” He leaned back and propelled himself up onto the ledge, he shot a web down, and Ned grabbed onto it, with one swing he was up too, “Good?”

“I will never get tired of that.”

“Welcome.” An echoed raspy voice came behind them; they both jumped out of their skin and turned around, “Peter, son of Mary. Edward, son of Marina.”

The figure was floating off the ground, and a black hood was covering its face, Ned nudged Peter’s arm, “Dude, it’s a flipping dementor.”

“I know.” Peter muttered, he held his arm out and pointed at the figure, “Hey, how do you know who we are?”

“It is my curse to know all who journey here.” The figure glided through the shadows into the light, to reveal his red skin.

“More like Darth Maul then” Ned muttered under his breath.

Peter stepped in front of Ned, making sure he was in-between him and the figure, “Who are you?”

“Consider me a guide, to you, and to all seek the soul stone.”

“That’s what we are here for.” Peter said, “Can you take us to it?”

“If only it were that easy.”

* * *

The Stonekeeper guided Peter and Ned up to the top of the mountain, which was separated by two pillars. Peter had to keep grabbing Ned’s shoulder and pulling him along, his friend was getting caught up in awe of being on another planet.

“What you seek lies in front of you,” The Stonekeeper said gesturing over the cliff face, “As what does what you fear.”

“What?” Ned asked, his forehead creasing in confusion.

Peter held his arm back, telling Ned to stay back; Peter approached the ledge and looked down, “I think the stone is down there.” He turned back on his heel to stare at Ned.

“How do we get it?”

“Only one of you can retrieve the stone.” The figure said; Ned and Peter snapped their attention to him, “...In order to take the stone, you must lose that which you love. An everlasting exchange, a soul for a soul.”

Peter pressed his head in his hand as he held his breath, “Shit.” He scrambled away, pressing a hand on Ned’s back; he pushed him away from the Stonekeeper.

“Dude…” Ned placed a hand on Peter’s shoulder, “Are you okay? You’re shaking.”

“No, no.” Peter sat down on a rock, “I’m fine...just stuck.”

“Wait, you think he’s telling the truth?” He asked, “I mean, how can we trust him?”

“I don’t know man.” Peter bowed his head into his hand, “This is not what I thought….”

 _Ned shouldn’t be here,_ that’s all Peter could think about. He let his friend join him on a life-threatening mission, _this was his fault._ Initially, Tony and Peter were the ones who were meant to travel to Vormir; it only changed when the team realised Tony was needed back in the  _Battle of New York,_  alongside Lang, Barton and Banner. Tony would not let Peter go alone, and neither would Ned, who jumped at the chance to protect his friend.

Everyone had thought it was a good idea for Peter and Ned to go, Nebula warned them how dangerous and volatile Vormir could be, and they needed to make sure they got along for the plan to work. Peter and Ned had never fallen out, _not really,_  they had argued about _Star Wars theories_  a few times. Tony had knighted Ned as a ‘ _temporary Avenger_ ’ before the mission, it had been a happy moment amongst the preparation for the time heist. Looking back, Peter wished he had stopped himself; he should have never let Ned come.

“Peter?”

“This isn’t a trick.” He darted his eyes up to Ned, “Nebula told me that Thanos came here for the soul stone with her sister, he came back with the stone, and _without_ her.”

Ned’s breath hitched, and he turned on his foot, looking away from Peter; he bowed his head into his chest, “Remember the time before all of this?”

Peter snorted as he looked up at his friend, “You mean the time before Spider-Man?”

“Yeah.”

Ned absent-mindedly kicked a rock on the ground, he scoffed, “Boring.”

Peter’s forehead creased and raised his eyebrows, “Boring?”

“Dude we were losers before all of this,” Ned said, Peter bounced up onto his feet as they both laughed.

“Nah, I think we’re still losers.” Peter smiled, “MJ would say so.”

Ned nodded as he turned to face Peter, “Yeah, yeah, she would.” He crossed his arms over his chest as he shrugged, “But I mean we’re both Avengers now, that’s quite...cool.”

Peter smiled as he blinked away tears, “Yeah, that is quite cool.”

"So…” Ned trailed off as he dotted his eyes down to his shoes, “What do we do now? _You and me_?”

“We’re the Avengers, man.” Peter smiled falsely, “I think we...have to finish this.”

Ned swallowed the lump forming in his throat, “We could go back home, try again.”

Peter shook his head and reached forward, placing his hand on Ned’s shoulder, “We have one shot.”

“Okay….” Ned nodded, “So, we know who it….”

“Yeah, yeah,” Peter wiped a hand over his face before letting out a deep breath, “We know who it has to be.”

Their hearts sank, and the reality of the situation hit them when, in unison, they both uttered the word ‘ _Me_.’

“No. No, _no_.” Peter stuttered as he held out his arm, pointing to the ledge, “No, Ned, it has to be me.”

“Dude, you’re Spider-Man!” Ned exclaimed, “You’re a superhero, I’m _just_...Ned.”

“And?!” He shouted, “Me being Spider-Man doesn’t make my life more valuable than yours!”

“Peter, come on…”

“No!” Peter said sharply, “I’m not worth more than you.”

“Peter, the world needs you.” Ned cried, “You’re not just Peter Parker, you’re--”

“Don’t say it...please.” Peter pleaded, “Spider-Man does not make me better than you.”

“What about May?!” Ned asked, “And Tony, they’re expecting you to come _home_!”

“Whatever it takes,” Peter muttered repeating Tony's rallying call,  he locked eyes with Ned, “May and Tony...they have other people. May has Happy, Tony has Morgan and Pepper.”

“What about me?!” Ned cried, “What do I have _without_ you?!”

Peter pulled on his shoulder and propped his forehead against Ned’s as he grabbed his hand, “You are doing this to bring back your parents....” He uttered, “I can’t tell them that I let you…”

“Peter, people need you….”

“Doesn’t matter.” Peter closed his eyes, “What’s the point in having these powers if I can’t save my best friend?”

Ned leaned back, wiping his tears away with the back of his sleeve, “...You’re right.”

Peter cautiously looked up and faked a reassuring smile, “It’s gonna be okay.”

Ned looked up to the stone walls, not able to look at Peter, “Yeah.”

Peter edged towards the drop, “...I love you, man.”

Ned tilted his head into his shoulder as a sob caught in his throat, “I love you too.” With all his remaining willpower, Ned kicked the back of Peter’s leg, he grabbed his shoulder and flipped him over onto his back.

Peter hadn’t expected the attack, his senses hadn’t even warned him because Ned had never been a danger. Peter brought his hand to his chest as he coughed, winded by the impact of the fall. He turned onto his side to see Ned charging over towards the edge, “Ned!”

Ned didn’t listen to Peter’s cries, he just kept running until he reached the threshold and jumped over, allowing himself to fall. Suddenly, he jolted and crashed into the wall, he whimpered as he opened his eyes.

“What the--” He looked up to see that he was only a few meters down suspended in mid-air; he noticed a line of web connected to the cuff of his jacket, holding him up, “No.” _Peter had taken precautions to keep him alive._

Ned looked up just as Peter leapt off the edge; Ned kicked the wall to knock himself back, he held his hand out and grabbed Peter’s wrist, catching him before he fell; Ned gasped in surprise, not expecting to have the strength and speed to catch him in time.

“Web yourself up!” Ned begged, “Save yourself, _please_ ….” He pulled on Peter’s arm, but he kept slipping away, “Peter, please!”

Peter looked at Ned with his familiar wide-eyes, he smiled; it was small and broken, but it was still a _smile_ . Even in his last moments, Peter was trying desperately to protect Ned, to keep him safe. Like he had always done. His smile didn’t reassure Ned though, not this time, it did the exact opposite, _it terrified him._

He pulled desperately on Peter’s arm, “Peter…"

“Ned...” Peter said softly, making sure he kept his eyes fixed on his best friend, “ _I’m sorry._ ”

“Don’t…..”

Peter swung forward, and with one faithful kick, his hand slipped away from Ned’s grasp, and he fell. In a single second, _Peter was gone_. Ned didn’t have time to reach for him, he didn’t even have time to finish his plea.

“Peter!” He screamed, keeping his hand outstretched; he closed his eyes just before his friend hit the ground. _Just before his friend died._

After a few seconds, he opened his eyes. He knew he had too. He had to see, he needed to know that Peter was definitely _gone_ . He regretted, opening his eyes the second he did; Peter was laid on his back, his lifeless eyes staring up at the sky, _up at Ned_. Blood surrounded his head from where he’d hit the ground; his arms were stretched out to their sides while his legs were scrawled to one side, in an unnatural position, from where they had broken on impact.

Ned darted his head away, looking up as he whimpered; the sky above him exploded into colour, and a bright white light blinded him.

He blinked open his eyes; he was no longer hanging off the side of the mountain. He was laid down in a lake, surrounded by nothing but darkness. He sat up, his eyes searched for Peter, but his body was nowhere to be seen. He looked over to his closed fist, to see a glowing orange stone.

He sobbed as he opened his closed hand, “Peter."

* * *

 

When Ned arrived back in the Avengers compound, he kept his head bowed into his chest as he deactivated his suit. He couldn’t breathe, he knew when he did, he would _break_.

He listened to the joyful celebrations of the rest of the team, he didn’t want to hear the end of their cheers. He didn’t want them to know what had happened, what Peter had done.

Ned wasn’t an Avenger, _not anymore_. He was just a boy who lost his best friend.

The laughter in the room came to an abrupt stop as Tony stepped forward, and with a trembling voice asked, “Ned, where’s Peter?”


End file.
